


One Reading Session A Day

by Nour



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at Humor, But That Isn't Really Important, Characters Reading Fanfiction, Commentary, Eren Is Just Completely Lost, Eren Seems To Think Everyone Is On Crack, Fluff-ish?, Levi Is A Total Sucker For Fanfictions, M/M, Oh And They Are Both Bronies, The Word Fuck Is Abused
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-17
Packaged: 2018-02-03 22:28:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1758553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nour/pseuds/Nour
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi and Eren are two dorky best friends who watch My Little Pony, but not's not important.</p><p>You see, recently Levi has a found a website known as "Archive Of Our Own" and this website contains oh so many fanfictions from different types of shows and/or other media types.</p><p>And he has just come across a CRAP-load of fanfictions for a pairing known as Levi/Eren. Ironic? Yes.</p><p>So basically Levi starts reading all these fanfictions about these characters from the show known as "Attack on Titan" and he decides to show Eren some rather interesting ones, in which they have commentary battles with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Commentary Session #1: You Belong To Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PyroGrape](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PyroGrape/gifts), [mihori](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mihori/gifts), [Olivier_Armstrong_iz_bae](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olivier_Armstrong_iz_bae/gifts), [nightcrawler554](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightcrawler554/gifts).



> OKAY!!!! HELLOOOOOO!
> 
> So, sorry if the summary is kind a confusing I just didn't know how to word it XD, but basically this will be a multi-chapter fanfiction that consist of some of my favorite fanfictions of Levi and Eren, and Levi and Eren themselves doing the commentary.
> 
> I haven't decided on how many chapters yet but most likely, around 13 to 15.
> 
> Anywhore, chapter 1 and 2 will consist of two fanfictions by none other than PyroGrape so you may commense reading.
> 
> (And I will add on more authors to the "Gift this work to" but for now it's just PyroGrape because I don't want to spoil the rest. :P)

"Levi! My Little Pony is starting, you are going to miss it!" Eren shouted, even though he was about 8 feet away from Levi's desk. Levi just hummed in response and paid no mind to Eren's beckoning.

Eren let out a loud groan and rose from his bean bag, skipping over too Levi's desk. "Leviiiii." Eren cooed in his ear, in which Levi just swatted his face away. "Your breath fucking smells, go brush your teeth." Levi said with a sigh, while pinching the bridge of his nose.

"It does not!" Eren retorted. "I will have you know I just brushed my teeth a few minutes ago, after you forced that sardine invested pizza down my throat." Eren said, "It was such a traumatic moment." He began. "I COULD HAVE DIED LEVI! YOU KNOW I HAVE BAD GAG REFLEX! AND WHO PUTS SARDINES ON PIZZA?!" Eren exclaimed, well he exaggerated. "Oh don't act you didn't like it. I shove a certain 'thing' down your throat all the time and you never complained." Levi replied.

"Maybe if you didn't keep your fucking sausage lodged in my throat for like ten fucking minutes while you cum down my throat, I could actually say something!" Eren yelled while glaring at Levi.

_(Um, let's just say they have a friends with benefits relationship. o3o)_

"Tch. Even after, you never say anything. Now shut the fuck up and come read this." Levi said as he motioned for Eren to come closer. "But Leeeviii, Ponyville awaits! Our fellow bronies as well!" Eren said in a child like tone. "I'm sure they can wait a little longer, now come." Eren groaned, but complied, plopping down in another chair next to Levi's. "What is so god damn important that it cost us to miss the beginning of our show?" Eren asked, resting his chin in his palm and fixing his gaze on Levi's computer screen.

"Well," Levi began. "I found this website called 'Archive Of Our Own' and it has all these fanfictions from all these different types a shows and I was originally going to find some My Little Pony ones, but somehow I managed to end up on this one page for a pairing going by, 'Levi/Eren Yeager'"

Eren's eyes widened. "What in the actual fuck?! That's my name! And your name is Levi! HOLY FUCK BRAIN FART." Eren exclaimed. "Well actually I spell my last name, 'Jaeger' but it's still weird."

"Talk about ironic." Levi said with a sigh. "Ironic!?!? That's fucking insane Levi! What show is this pairing from?" Eren asked.

"An anime known as 'Shingeki no Kyojin' or 'Attack on Titan' for us non-native people." Levi explained, "Attack on Titan.....? I have never heard of that before."

"Me neither, but anyways. I was curious so I decided to look through all of these stories displayed and I found a rather interesting one, it's called. 'You Belong To Me' by PyroGrape. It's um. Well um, like I said interesting. You know what, just read for yourself."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT! THAT POOR DOG! THAT DUDE IS FUCKING ON CRACK OR SOMETHING, I mean cheesus."

"Really? That's all you have to say? IS YOUR ATTENTION SPAN NOT LARGE ENOUGH THAT YOU JUST WORRIED ABOUT A CANINE THE WHOLE TIME?!? And what the fuck are you crying! Also, never ever say cheesus again, like fucking really?"

"I can't help it! I hate animal abuse." Eren said while blowing his nose. "You really are a dimwit." Levi mumbled.

"But honestly what did you think of the story?" Levi asked.

"Oh that. IT WAS MESSED UP, LIKE I SAID BOTH OF THEM ARE DEMENTED AND ON CRACK! AND WHY THE HELL WAS THE PALE DUDE SUCKING HIS BLOOD! IS HE EDWARD CULLEN?!" Eren yelled, pulling his legs up to his chest

"He is obviously human! I mean, he is not baring fangs or anything like that, or withering away from sunlight. Some people just have weird fetishes okay Eren?" Levi said with a groan. This sparked Eren's attention.

"Is it one of your fetishes Levi?" Eren asked suddenly.

Levi turned his gaze towards him and gave him a smirk. "You want to find out?" He purred.

Eren tensed at his response and his sudden closeness. "Uhm. Not Really."

Levi kept drawing near him until he was on the edge of his seat,and he suddenly land butt-first on the floor.

Levi chuckled, leaving a clueless Eren on the floor not even bothering to help him up. Eren glared slightly and stood up, taking his place back on the chair. "Also, what's dry humping? The two characters were evidently doing it in a janitors closet." He asked.

Levi stared at him with a flattened expression. "Are you fucking serious? You don't know what dry humping is."

"Pfft, I was obviously kidding. I just wanted to see your reaction, of course I know what dry humping is." Eren replied, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. "Really, please do tell me then. If you obviously understand the concept." Levi cooed.

Eren tensed and spoke, "W-Well.." He stuttered. "Ya know, it's where two people, clearly. Come in contact and start... humping... each other... while being dry..." Eren said.

"Wow, you have reached the final stage of being a complete idiot. I honestly cannot believe you don't know this."

"Wait, does it involve the rear-end?" Eren interjected. 

"What? No, really Eren? Me and you have dry humped each other like 10 times, in fact we did it just last week in your car." Levi said with irritation.

"That's what that was! I never knew! Wait who the hell gave you permission to dry hump me you pervert!"

"Well according to what I was seeing you didn't stop me and you happily went along with it." Levi said.

"So you're telling me, that us rubbing our clothed erections against each other was dry humping?" Eren asked.

"Fucking yes!" Levi said as he face palmed himself. "Oh! Well what do you know." Eren said with a chuckle.

"Congratulations you learned something new today." Levi murmured

Eren nodded and faced Levi once more. "So can ponies dry hump too?" He asked.

"You got to be kidding me."


	2. Commentary Session #2: Do Not Turn To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gahhhhh! This chapter was super hard to write, I had A LOT of trouble with the humor and I got stumped on a few occasions because I didn't know what to write. XD
> 
> Sorry if this chapter is a little all over the place, but eh I tried.

** Day 2 **

 

"I'm a boss bitch, bitch, bitch. I'm a boss ass bitch." Eren was chanting as he entered the dorm room. He had his earphones in and the volume on his iPod up to max.

He began to absentmindedly twerk over to his bed, to set his backpack down. He began to sing louder and louder as the lyrics played, oblivious to the fact that Levi was staring at him from his desk, and when Eren turned around from basically giving his bed a twerk show. He locked gazes with Levi.

"Oh hey Levi! I didn't see you there. I just got back from twerk class, and I kinda was still pretty much lost in my daze." Eren said sheepishly.

"Is there even a twerk class on campus?" Levi deadpanned, while folding his arms. "Uh, duh! When I saw that they made one I just had to join! The class is completely dedicated to Miley Cyrus. Man, she is such an inspiration." Eren said with a goofy smile.

"Yeah, I bet strippers and crackheads look up to her all the time." Levi drawled.

Eren rolled his eyes at him and trotted over to their mini fridge, pulling out a can of Dr. Pepper. "I had a great day today!" Eren suddenly exclaimed. "Don't care." Levi spoke.

"Just listen! You remember that selfie I posted last night?" Eren asked as he walked over to Levi and plopped down on his lap. "Um, the one of you doing an impression of Honey BooBoo's mom?" Levi said, wrapping his arms around Eren's waist.

"Yup! So many people came up to me and complimented me on the double chin! They even printed the picture out and plastered it all around campus. Finally I am getting recognition for my spot on impressions!" Eren said happily. In which Levi just face palmed himself. "Eren, I am pretty sure if they put that ridiculous picture up all over campus, it's their way of making a fool out of you." He said with a sigh.

"No way! You are just saying that because you are jealous that people find me funny." Eren retorted.

"Yeah. That's why." Levi said, rolling his eyes. "Anyways. Remember that fanfiction I showed you yesterday?" Levi questioned, immediately earning a response from Eren. "How could I forget. That story gave me nightmares."

"You are such a coward." Levi countered. "It wasn't even scary."

"Hey! Those two had murder intentions! Last night in my dream, they were chasing me with a knife and were forcing me to watch them make out! I mean who does that!" Eren retorted.

"Whatever. Anyways, I found another fanfiction by the same author, cal-" Eren cut him off.

"Oh goodie, another story written by the author whom was on crack when she wrote the first one!" Eren said sarcastically. "Eren, do you just automatically assume everybody these days is on crack?" Levi asked.

"Only if I think they have lost their sanity."

"Actually, stories like her first one are pretty popular. They are called 'Yandere' stories and they are usually pretty fucked up." Levi interjected, "Great more crackheads! What has this world come too!" Eren countered.

"Don't get your panties in a twist this story isn't yandere. It's not modern, and involves Titans and Vampires." Levi said, scrolling to the top of the page of the first chapter. "Here, Read."

"Don't waaaannnaaa." Eren complained, burying his face in the crook of Levi's neck. "My eyes are meant for watching TV, not reading."

"Read, or no blowjob tonight." He threatened. Eren didn't hesitate when he heard this and quickly obliged, beginning to read. "Also, this one has a lot more chapters than the first one, so it might take you awhile longer." Levi warned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"My eyes hurt. That story was long as hell!" Eren yelled, while faceplanting the desk.

"I agree, but it was beautifully written and the plot was very interesting." Levi commented.

"You're telling me! Being from the titan race sounds so cool! I can just imagine me as a titan! Just being all like, 'HEY BITCHES COME SUCK MY COLOSSAL DICK!!' Ya know, because obviously my dick would increase in size as well my height."

"I beg to differ. You're dick brings shame to everyone, even if you were titan. I bet it would remain the size of a walnut." Levi said with a smirk. "The hell?!?! How dare you hurt my dick's precious feelings! It just gets cold sometimes Levi, but other than that it is decently sized! You are just jealous, you monster." Eren shot back.

"If you are referring to my dick, I am well aware that I have a monster of a dick Eren, unlike someone I know. Thanks for the compliment though." He said nonchalantly.

"It wasn't intended as a fucking compliment to your dick you asswipe! I was just calling you a monster for making fun of my dick!" Eren replied. Shooting a glare at the smirking Levi. "All right Eren. Whatever you say."

"Now that we are off the topic of dicks. I would just like to say, that Hange chick seems mentally deranged. I can see why my counterpart can't put up with her." Levi deadpanned. "I thought she was adorable! I could totally use a friend like her, not mention I would love to have that He-Man lookalike named Armin be my older brother!"

"Of course you would Eren."

"What you wouldn't? He could help you reach high shelves Levi! Wouldn't that be great? You could clean all the places you aren't able to reach!" Eren said, grinning at his friend.

Levi shot Eren a deathly glare. "Shut it, I am not fucking disabled. Some people are just born short!" Levi retorted, in which Eren just cackled. "On another note though, the vampire dude has a ponytail Levi. I wonder what you would look like with a ponytail. Probably adorable as fuck."

"No wait! You would definitely look better in pigtails, or may-" He was cut short. "Eren! I am not a fucking girl." Levi replied coldly.

"Yeah, but you would make a cute girl." Eren said giving Levi a cheesy grin. "Also, the titan character is so fucking badass in the last chapter! He is definitely a boss ass bitch!"

"Well you seem highly infatuated with him." Levi commented with a roll of his eyes.

"And that vampire dude gives off a rapey vibe to me, it's like you know he wants the booty." Eren said, receiving a sigh from Levi.

"Hey Levi, who is your favorite character in this story?" Eren asked. Levi raised his brow and began to contemplate. "Well, I am not going to lie, but definitely the dog Mikasa."

"WHAT?!? SHE ISN'T EVEN A MAJOR CHARACTER."

"Eh. Who cares. I can already make a guess and say that Eren is your favorite, yeah?" Levi said.

"Of course! He should be grateful I chose him as my favorite character." Eren said with a grin. 

"Yeah, I am sure he is." Levi replied sarcastically. 

"Say Eren, you do realize that Titan boy is said to be the bride."

"Of course I do! Which is why me and you need to go dress fitting!!!" He replied happily.

"What? ARE YOU REALLY THAT GAY? I AM NOT TRYING ON A FUCKING DRESS. I THINK THIS STORY HAS FUCKED UP YOUR BRAIN." Levi said, pushing Eren off his lap. "Aw come on Levi! Lets do it in the spirit of this amazing story! I bet I would look stunning in a dress!"

"Yeah, if you were a girl!" Levi countered. "I am really surprised you aren't all for this Levi. I mean we could take pictures of me and everything!"

Levi raised his brows and turned to Eren. "On second thought. You are right. I would love to add on to your list of embarrassments."

"That's the spirit! Now, how about that blowjob?"


	3. Commentary Session #3: Big Brother Levi & Little Eren

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say, each chapter will be at least 1000 words long or more. That is what I am aiming for :P
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to Mihori! :D

** Day 3 **

 

"I cannot believe you actually bought that dress." Levi said to Eren as they entered their dorm. It was Tuesday and they _actually_ went dress shopping, and Eren _actually_ bought a dress and begged Levi to take pictures of him to post on Instagram. This really got Levi thinking, did Eren truly enjoy embarrassing himself? Who knows.

"Hey, the sales lady said it made my ass look good, and that it complimented my frame." Eren replied as he placed the bag that contained his dress on his bed. "God you are such an idiot." Levi began, "She didn't actually mean that. She works for the retail industry. People like her are supposed to say things they don't mean in order for a customer to buy their products."

"Psh, quit lying. You are just saying that as an excuse because you don't want to admit that my ass looks fucking amazing in that dress!" Eren fumed. Levi just rolled his eyes and figured that there would be no winning with Eren. "Yes. Once again you are right Eren." He said.

"Thank you! Now, lets go search up fruit and vegetable jokes online!" Eren said with a huge smile plastered on his face. "Um dare I ask, why?" Levi said with a sigh. "Because! I am bored! Now come on!" Eren chimed as he grabbed Levi's wrist and yanked him towards the desk. Eren sat down in which Levi followed in tow, landing delicately on Eren's lap. "This is so stupid. I could be reading fanfictions right now." Levi complained.

"What is with you and fanfictions lately? They are so weird." Eren said, eyeing Levi and absentmindedly running his hand through is raven locks. "They are not weird!" Levi retorted. "Some of them have really good plots and plus I like to read!"

"You are kidding me right?! Most of them involve just sex!" Eren said. "It's called smut! Jeez Eren get it right!" Levi quickly shot back. "This is bad, these fanfictions have completely consumed you! How many have you read since you started?!?!"

"I don't fucking know, 2, 3, 4, 5, 50? Who knows? I ain't fucking counting." Levi spoke as he folded his arms. "And just yesterday you were in love with that one fanfiction with the Titans and Vampires so do not dare say you aren't interested in reading them, if you fucking obsessed over that one! Going as far as to buy a dress in it's honor!" Levi fumed.

Eren let out a sigh. "Okay, okay. You got me there. But that isn't important! Right now we need to get to those fruits and vegetables jokes!"

"Oh, for fucks sake." Levi deadpanned.

"Oooh! Oooh! Oooh! I found a site! Okay, okay! Listen to this one, and no looking at the screen!" Eren squealed. "When do you know a banana wants to dance?" He said. "Go on! Guess."

"Do I really fucking have t-"

"Yes!" Eren cut in. "Fine! Um, when he is stripping off his peel? I don't fucking know." (Oh Levi. XD)

"Nope! It's when you see a banana shake!" And suddenly Eren bursted out laughing. "You are such a child." Levi deadpanned. "Let me see this fucking site." Levi said as he directed his gaze on the screen and began to scroll down. Reviewing over all the 'jokes.'

"These jokes are fucking retarded! How does the lemon ask for a hug? Really, by saying give me a squeeze?"

"Aw how adorable!" Eren spoke, a blush beginning to hover over his cheeks. "Levi I can be your lemon! Give me a squeeze." Eren chimed and began to pull Levi from behind into a hug. "No! Get the fuck away!" Levi yelled, trying his best to break out of Eren's hold but to no avail.

"Levi!" Eren whined. "Pretty please!!!"

Levi gave Eren a glare but his expression soon softened once he saw that beautiful grin on his best friends face, and he gave in. Accepting Eren's bear hug. "All right there." Levi said. "Now, enough with these gay ass jokes. It's time to read fanfiction!"

Eren let out a groan but didn't object.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Eren and Levi found a story fairly quickly. It was called. 'Big Brother Levi & Little Eren.'

"Awwwwwww how adorable!!!!!!!" Eren said. "I mean it was a little weird considering it was hinted to be incest, but that little Eren reminds me of myself when I was little tike!"

"Oh my goodness, don't even compare yourself to him. Your mom told me that when you were little all you did was cry and shit in any area that wasn't the toilet. I mean were you even potty trained?" Levi asked.

"Of course I was! I just thought that taking a shit in the toilet was too modern. So I wanted to be mainstream and take a shit in places that most kids wouldn't think of."

"Oh so now you're a hipster?" Levi said and rolled his eyes.

"Well I suppose back then I was, but I did eventually settle with the toilet when I was like five."

"I bet your mom was happy when that day came." Levi said, earning a chuckle from Eren. "Yes she definitely was, and one more thing. WHEN THE HELL DID YOU EVER HAVE THIS CONVERSATION WITH MY MOM?!?"

"Ehhh? Couple months back when me and you went to visit her for Christmas break. She also told me that you used to run around naked, only wearing a cape, claiming you were the new and improved version of Superman."

"Remind me to never allow you to stay at my place again." Eren deadpanned.

"Anyways! The Levi in this story seems to have possessive tendencies but I feel as if they are just plain out filled with love for his brother, and dare I say. I find that rather interesting." Levi said.

"I still find shit like that creepy! But overall this story is just plain out adorable, and I can't help but to think that Erwin, the cousin, might be egging Levi on because he is aware of the affections that Levi has for his younger brother and I think that Erwin just plain out has a crush on him and is just bent on separating Levi and Eren, because ya know he just fucking shows up and it's weird!"

"I actually agree with you, but doesn't he realize that he is only bringing the two characters closer together? But who knows, our theory could very well be wrong." Levi replied.

"Hm, well I suppose I can agree that me and Little Eren aren't exactly the same, but if there is one thing we both have common. I like the way you taste Levi." Eren purred seductively and tackled Levi to the ground.

"Time for me to shove your cucumber in my mouth!" Eren announced.

Levi sighed. "Really Eren? Now you are comparing my dick size to a cucumber? It's obviously two cucumber sizes long."

"Wait!" Eren suddenly yelled, ignoring Levi's comment.

"Perhaps this is the perfect time for me to wear my new Cocktail Dress!"

Oh Lord.


	4. Commentary Session #4: Pure Desperation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let the Yandere goodness continue!! (Meaning, the read yet another Yandere story)
> 
> And uh, Levi gets drunk. XD

** Day 4 **

"Leeeeeviiii, guess what Farlan just brought us!" Eren shouted as he skipped over to Levi, with a bag in his hand. "Did he buy you another dress?" Levi asked, "No!!!! Something better!" Cooed Eren as he revealed the contents of the bag. 

"I don't do beer, especially beer with lime." Levi drawled.

"Come on just try some some!" He said, as he was already beginning to chuck off the bottle caps and pour the beer into two shot glasses. "I really wonder why Farlan would give alcohol to someone like _you_ I mean you can hardly stand one or two cups."

"Cups! That reminds me! Farlan also told me that me and you should watch this video, called. 'Two girls, 1 cup.' He said it's some kind a lesbian shit."

"Oh trust me, it is lesbian _shit_ " Levi spoke. "We are not watching it, I will not allow Farlan to corrupt you like this, that video only brings nightmares trust me Eren."

"But Levi!!!!" Eren said, "Pretty please!"

"No. It is not something worth watching, come on lets just drink, okay?" Levi said, hoping that drinking would get Eren's mind off that god awful video. "Oh yeah! He is your shot glass!" Eren replied happily, and already began to down his first shot. Levi pinched the bridge of his nose and then sighed, downing his shot as well.

"Another!" Eren chimed, filling up the shot glasses once more.

Shot after shot, Levi began to feel dizzy but that didn't stop him from chugging an entire bottle instead of the shot glass. Eren stared in awe when he saw this, Levi could definitely hold his liquor it seemed.

And let's just say, Eren was the sober one here. "Hey um Levi, don't you think you should slow down? I mean Farlan only gave us so much, I thought maybe we could save a few bot-"

"Shhhhhhh...." Levi interrupted, sloppily placing his index finger on Eren's lips. "The alcohol gods have spoken, and they said that we should drink all the beer!" Levi shouted.

"Alcohol gods? Yeah you are definitely drunk."

"I am not!!" Levi spat. "I am perfectly sober! See watch, I am going to touch that light right there to prove it." Eren fixated his gaze on their ceiling dorm light, it was quite bright. "Um, Levi I don't think you should, I mean who knows how many degrees that light is."

"Shut up and watch me!" Levi said, and he stood up, clearly showing signs that he is indeed drunk because of how they way he can barely keep his balance. 

Levi stood on his tippy-toes, his fingers stretching out towards the illuminating light. Oh right, he's short he won't be able to reach that thing anyways.

"Almost there!" He said, stretching up as much as he could. "Levi it is no use, you are just too sho-"

"Do not finish that sentence unless you want to be thrown out the window." He said glaring at Eren. Eren just rolled his eyes, the man may be drunk but he still didn't wish to hear that he is mother fucking dwarf.

"Hold on, let me get a chair!" He said, walking over to his desk to grab his chair. Eren sighed and quickly grabbed Levi by the waist before he could try reaching for the light again. "Okay Levi you don't need to prove it to me, I believe you. How about we read some fanfiction now, what to do say?"

Levi just gave him an odd look. "You actually want to read fanfiction?"

"Well, I suppose. I mean I would read it for you." Eren replied, giving Levi a smile.

Levi rolled his eyes. "If you insist then I suppose we could read one."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Levi had evidently been in the mood for a yandere story, and he immediately found one that piqued his interest. It was called. 'Pure Desperation'

"OH MY GOD THAT POOR SQUIRREL!!! HE WILL NEVER SEE HIS FAMILY AGAIN!" Eren yelled, as he wiped away his tears with a tissue.

"Again, with the animals." Levi deadpanned, as he downed yet another beer.

"Man this story was fucked up!!! I mean that kid's childhood is fucked up, that stalker is fucked up! I'm fucked up!" Levi said.

"I felt really bad for the boy though. I mean the only person that loved him was his mother, seemingly, and of course she died and he was stuck with that abusive father. And to make matter's worse this other Levi became interested in him and really fucked up his life more by kidnapping him, and even though I very much dislike the father. He got killed right before his son's eyes, I mean that must have been a traumatizing experience for the boy." Eren said.

"Well all that is true, but I found it so sweet how much he cared for other Eren! I mean aw, he even wiped his ass! How considerate." Levi said in a sing-song-voice.

"Yeah, I just found all of that creepy." Eren deadpanned. "Well Eren it is a yandere story! By the way, we should go buy a squirrel at the pet store!" Levi spoke.

"What? I am pretty sure the pet store doesn't offer squirrels, and besides in the state that you are in I wouldn't trust you to take care of it. You'll probably get the same idea and skin it alive, or something morbid."

Levi smirked and leaned closer towards Eren. "Well then if I can't have a squirrel then I guess I will just have to settle with you."

Eren's eyes widened and he pushed Levi away. "Okay you are way drunk!" He shouted and sat up.

"Come on Eren, let's play together! Just me and you!" Levi said, his smirking widening as he began to move closer towards Eren once more. "I mean you did deprive me of my squirrel!"

Eren ran straight out of the dorm room. Glancing over his shoulder to see Levi chasing after him, and he was going pretty fast even in his drunken state. "Eren don't run away! Why don't you want to play with me!!?"

"Levi, stop! You are drunk and you honestly freaking me out!" Eren shouted over his shoulder, when he suddenly tripped and faceplanted in the hallway. And suddenly an immense amount of weight plopped on top of him, already pulling down his trousers. "Levi no! We are in the hallway!" He said, trying his hardest to keep his trousers up, but to no avail. "Oh Eren, public sex sounds like so much fun though! And besides you need to punished for not allowing me to get a squirrel!"

"Okay fine you can have a fucking squirrel! Just get the hell off me!"

"Really you mean it!!" Levi said, suddenly sounding not so sadistic, but rather happy. "If it will make you happy then fine." Eren said with a sigh of relief.

"YAY!!! LETS GO THEN!" Levi shouted and yanked Eren by his wrist, moving outside of the dorm building.

"At least let me pull up my pants first!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah sorry! It was my goal to update every day, but it appears that I have failed.
> 
> Anyways. Sorry this chapter isn't much, the humor is just getting harder and harder to write. x.x
> 
> But I still hoped you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I want to apologize for any grammar mistakes, I will edit if I see them.
> 
> Also. If you haven't read 'You Belong To Me' by PyroGrape. You need too!
> 
> It is an amazing Yandere story and oh my lawd I could read that story over and over. I highly recommend reading it, if you haven't already.
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments and/or feedback. 
> 
> Chapter 2 should be out tomorrow. ^^


End file.
